Found out through Facebook that someone I worked under for many years passed away. Her name was Bernadette Morrissey. I called an old friend that had also worked under Bern. It was shocking, sudden and sad. Apparently she died of leukemia. She had only found out very recently, maybe a week or so ago. Bernadette had a crown of flaming red hair and such a vibrant personality. She was a strong woman who served as a Vice President of a major financial firm. I don’t think we ever personally clashed, but with her as “management” and me as a working peon there were policies that I didn’t necessarily agree with. But I did always respect her. She was funny, sometimes kooky but always forthright. She was, essentially, a good soul. It’s sad knowing she’s no longer around.
Her viewing is tomorrow afternoon. It’s just a bus ride away, plus I know I’ll see some folks I haven’t seen in quite a while but … I don’t know if I’m going to go. I always said the next funeral I go to would be my own. I don’t like seeing someone at their wake/funeral. The “body” never looks like the person you knew, not really. Everyone will say “oh, they did a wonderful job” and “she looks so peaceful” but it just creeps me out. And the longer I sit there staring at the coffin, the more my mind seems to play tricks on me. It seems like the body is moving, slightly. Probably just my own fidgety desire to escape the somber setting, the platitudes and the cloying scent of flowers, beautifully arranged and displayed. Also it tends to bring up memories of other funerals/wakes I’ve been party to: father, mother, great aunt, other relatives and other friends, as well as, inevitably, my own mortality.
I’ll let you know what I decide.